Sacrifice is the key

How great is Allah swt, the greatest and best of planners! I am telling you,  one thing I have learnt from this hijrah to another country for my children's deen is that sacrifice is the key. I think our religion is based on some sort of sacrifice  We cant get something we want without some sacrifice involved. I hated that word -scarifice! It meant hardship, it meant tears, it meant toil, it meant extra duas, it meant  not knowing, it meant totally dependence on the planer,  it meant change, it meant EFFORT. Yet if we don't change our condition in some way, our environment  or change something within ourselves, or our plans, we cant get anywhere. We stay still- we don't move ahead. If we don't  change or sacrifice something, be it the way we use  our time, our familiar surrounding, looking after our heath, out out look,our mind set etc we stay the same, and that can result in a person that never grows

I hope you know what I mean, what  Iam trying to say.  I have been here in Malaysia almost two months and finally today was the day Allahswt shown  my husband, Nabil what school he will attend. We have worked hard and tried to get him into any school since we arrived here. I couldn't understand this week why he hasn't been able to attend school. I was at the point of having to enroll him into the Australian long distance education curriculum.   I kept hearing this voice in my head that said  don't lose hope. We had to keep focusing  on our objectives and maintaining that focus in every aspect of our lives- our children deen and how to keep them as true servants of Allahswt and his Glorious Book, the Quran .So I kept making duas and we kept trying, visiting schools and madrasahs near and far, two taking us three hours to find in a country where to find the closes main shop the first week took us three hours instead of the usual 10 mins, as we got lost.

AlumidAllah today my son Nabil called me today, after he and his father had spent three hours on the road trying to find yet again another   madrasah." Mum its the one! I really like! there is ten 13 year olds doing year one Alim, and seven 15 years and one 21 years  from Finland and a blond dude from Adelaide!  One is from Norway, one form China, one from"  as his conversation continued mentioning with excitement  the various countries the boys were from. My heart was so happy to hear those words. Everything sounded just rigth (inshAllah ameen). There are 64 students at madrasah Alhikmah  from year one alim to year six alim and some doing purely Hafiz.  

Now when we arrived in Malaysia Nabil was set on attending a normal islamic school with full curriculum  That was fine with me and as a added bonuses I wanted Arabic, as a extra subject (Most Malaysia's schools offer Arabic as it is a popular subject here alhumidAllah). After the weeks went by and my poor husband, who had been to the Education department six times over the course of almost two months, to a shieks house and local politician to find out why they haven't process Nabils application from, still no answers available. Nabil was getting bored, as an energetic  intelligent 13  year old, this was getting too much. He had been keeping himself busy  learning malay and  helping out at he beach lodge. This week I got him to watch a powerful lecture and it talked about how the youth just follow, follow everything the west demands of them. He had been quiet the last two days and than produce a letter in which he had wrote to me.It made my heart quiver   In the letter  he wrote how he would like to become a Alim and than a mufti by the age of 28, and how he wants to learn frm a scholar, learn the answers to our deen and that he didn't want to be corrupted by this dunya.

One thing I promised Nabil before we left Perth was that he would have the final say with regards to what school he went too. This was important to him, as I had deprived him of being at a main stream school, which I new and Allahswt knows best, that homeschooling him was my best option for the protection of his deen at that time in his life. This decision was, I believed one of the best I did, yet it came with  some sacrifice on both our behalf  So to  not be forced into a schooling he didn't want was not something I would do to him, as there is no compulsion in deen.  No one can be forced to do an act of worship without their full will being  involved. One thing  I heave learnt when it comes to the up bring up of my children and step sons is coercion or force just doesn't work. Because at the end of the day, the soul needs to do the action only for Allahswt pleasure to be accountable. We need to do every action with sincerity of intention. So when my son said I want to be a Alim, that was the golden words I was hearing, ones that I didn't expect, the words that Allahwt as the best planner, new  would come out at this time and place...the right time and place.......and after sacrifice!

 And so I need to let go of my son, who I have intensely at times home schooled,  shared at times 24/7 together, discussed, laughed  and argued different points of view and subjects. I have to let him go in the path of seeking knowledge, knowing that he made the final decision. He will start a six year Alim course next week and he may come back after one month or three years or finish it inshAllah. Only Allah swt knows because only Allah swt chooses who of his servants he wants to take on that  journey in life. I can only equip him with the realization from a young age that his Rabb, yours and mine, is ever there for us in times of need and ease. That our focus and attainment is his pleasure. That without the remembrance  of Allahswt, the heart can never have true contentment and will be corrupted.

Now Iam not naive  I know what this means and I know the pit falls of a madrasah life that could entail, from the many bad stories I have heard or the skills he wont be exposed too. But I believe Allahswt, as the best of planners has assisted and directed us to this path, that not many people would be able to handle- to up root and start all over again away from home, family, friends and all that is familiar- every change possible from food, weather, culture, air quality, people etc.

I  have made my fair share of mistakes as a parent but I know the secret really is to bring up our children with the love, awareness and realization of how great Allahswt is, how much we are need him and how we must turn to him, have a dialogue with him, and aside our affairs to his trust. And dua!! never ending dua.

 I write this to inspire other parents to realize that with effort, Allahswt will save our children inshallah from the pit falls of this dunya. We may not need to leave our beloved homes, but we need to make every effort to nurture our children's iman and do everything possible to show them the beauty of Islam and protect, yes protect them with open eyes form the filthy and fitna of this dunya. With that said, many will do everything possible and hedayet is only in Allahswt hands, yet we need  to make the effort so that we can say full hearty that we tried the best we could to bring up our children in Islam- a beautiful way of life.

Kind Regards,

Khadija